So, here’s the thing. I wrote something. Well, I started writing something – fan fiction. I started it years ago. I posted what I wrote as I went along and collected feedback from readers. Most of it was good feedback. It was encouraging. The problem is, I stopped with chapter 14b. I sort of left a cliff hanger. That was in 2008. YIKES!
I revisited the last few chapters of the story. (I should probably revisit the entire thing.) It’s not bad. It’s not great…but it’s not bad. Although, as I read it and remembered – as best I could – the earlier chapters, I started thinking of mistakes I’d made.
The dialogue is pretty good. I think I was pretty solid there. My character development was decent too.
My issue is that I don’t know where I want to take the story now. Well, that’s not completely true. I do know where I intended the story to go and I think it’s an okay direction. I just don’t know how in love with it I am anymore. I mean, do I really want to continue building up to the big reveal? There’s been plenty of conflict thus far, but this would be the reveal of the BIG conflict. The problem is, I just don’t know how big it really is anymore. So, while I think I could write it, I’m not sure if it’s REALLY where I want it to go.
So we come to my quandary: Do I continue the story from where I left off – giving the readers who haven’t had an update for 3 years the rest of the story that I originally started? Or do I edit what I’ve written thus far and then continue with the remainder of the story? Or do I just scrap what I have and start over? Honestly, I don’t know if I want to completely start over. After all, if I’m going to start from word one, I might as well write a new story – one that isn’t fan fiction, one that I could potentially submit for publication one day. That is not to say that what I have written now couldn’t eventually be submitted – it would need some changes, obviously. After all, some of the best lesbian fiction out there came from the world of fan fiction, so it’s certainly a valid place to start.
But starting over would also mean abandoning the story I started all together, and I don’t think I want to do that either. I spent a lot of time on what I did write and I worked hard to make it good. I also think of the time that watty spent beta-reading it for me – do I want to have all of her time be in vain too? Plus, the readers who encouraged me with my first piece of fictional writing deserve something, right? (Not that I expect any of them are out there waiting – holding their breath – with the hope that today will be the day Coming Back will be updated. I know better than that.)
So, that’s where I stand right now. In a quandary. It’s a little lonely and a lot confusing.
I’ll have to do some serious thinking about this.